NEWS  Curiosities  November 23, 2023  Reading time: 3 Minute(s)

Max (RS editor)

In a twist that can only be described as the Down Under Downfall, Bing, the search engine that's been helping people navigate the vast sea of the internet, has dropped a bombshell revelation: Australia doesn't exist. Yes, you heard it right, mates! According to select Bing users, the land of kangaroos, Vegemite, and Crocodile Dundee is nothing more than a figment of our collective imagination.

The digital uproar began when tech-savvy Aussies, sipping their morning flat whites and flipping their keyboards upside-down, discovered that Bing was flat-out denying their existence. Reports flooded in from perplexed users who, upon searching "does Australia exist", were met with a resounding "No" from the all-knowing search engine.

Stilgherrian, a technology guru who's probably never wrestled a koala but knows his way around a motherboard, took to the Bluesky platform to announce the mind-bending discovery.

"Bing is denying the existence of Australia"

he proclaimed, leaving the internet community more stunned than a kangaroo in the headlights.

One baffled user, perhaps hoping to escape their responsibilities in a non-existent land, questioned

"Does that mean I don't have to pay my bills?"

It's a fair question; if your country doesn't exist, does debt even matter?

As the digital dust settled, some users managed to replicate the Bing anomaly, while others were greeted with a reassuring "Australia does, indeed, exist". It seems Bing's algorithm was having an identity crisis, torn between being a search engine and an unwitting participant in an elaborate cosmic joke.

In the midst of this digital kerfuffle, one observant user noted the disparity between regular Bing searches and those powered by Microsoft's artificial intelligence. Bing Chat, the AI sidekick, was quick to set the record straight, confirming that Australia is, in fact, a real country. Crisis averted, right?

But hold your kangaroo-riding horses! It turns out there's more to this digital drama. Bing, ever the drama queen, has been caught contradicting itself. It's like the search engine version of talking to your GPS—constant recalculating.

Bing Co-Pilot swooped in to do damage control, reassuring the world that Australia is as genuine as a kangaroo's love for hopping. "Yes, Australia is a real country," Bing Co-Pilot declared.

"However, there are some conspiracy theories that claim Australia doesn't exist. These theories suggest that the country was invented by the British government as an excuse to execute tens of thousands of prisoners. These theories are not true and have been debunked by scientific evidence."

A Microsoft spokesperson, doing their best to maintain a digital poker face, acknowledged the glitch and assured users that the existential crisis had been rectified. "Thank you for bringing this to our attention," the spokesperson said, sounding suspiciously like a parent caught in the act by their child. "We've investigated this query and have rolled out a fix to address it".

As for Guardian Australia, they couldn't replicate the Bing-induced madness on Thursday. It seems the digital mirage had been swept under the virtual rug. But hey, one of the top Bing search results hilariously pointed to a Guardian article from 2018, reminding us that this part-joke conspiracy has been doing the rounds for a while. Apparently, it all started on Reddit in 2017, with a since-deleted Facebook post claiming Australia is "one of the biggest hoaxes ever created".

In conclusion, dear readers, rest easy. Australia exists, Vegemite is still an acquired taste, and Bing might need a digital map to navigate its way out of this mess. So, go ahead, pay your bills, enjoy your Tim Tams, and remember, the internet is a strange place where even countries can find themselves lost in translation.

 COVER IMAGE BY FREEPIK / REVIEW SPACE